Finding Me- Jaipur Diaries

02-Dec-2018

The finding me workshop has been one of the most amazing things that I have ever experienced. This has truly changed the way I look at life drastically. Ten days ago, when I entered the workshop, I did not believe in the fact that we, the youth, had the power of affecting and influencing people and encouraging them to be the better people that they are. This workshop has made me aware that people of my age face all kinds of problems. That mine are not the most important. That I am not the only one. It has taught me that everyone in this world, no matter what their caste, creed, color, shape, size; are the same. That we all think alike and experience the same things. When we set out to spread this message to the youth, the feeling was wonderful. I realized that helping someone else overcome their flaws or plain accepting themselves and others as they are, is the best thing one can do. I have realized that we, the youth, can make a great impact on the world, to make it a better place for you and for me. – Simran Jain from Jayshree Periwal High School was one of the participants of the Youth Outreach workshop at Jaipur Literature Festival 2016

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Volunteer’s Diary- Sahyog

Entering the gates of Sahyog campus triggered a series of emotions in me. Was it anxiety or fear or anger or compassion or curiosity? I don’t know! I entered the campus with an empty mind. I tried not to have any presumed notions about these juvenile offenders. The term ‘juvenile’ is used for person below the age of 18, accused in any crime. Having worked with children before, I believe these children were a little different. However, they were and they did behave like any other child of their age group would have.

Freud’s Psychoanalytic theory suggests that personality is mostly established by the age of five. Early experiences play a large role in personality development and continue to influence behaviour later in life. If these psychosexual stages are completed successfully, the result is a healthy personality. If certain issues are not resolved at the appropriate stage, fixation can occur. Perhaps, this issue makes them different from other children. Dysfunctional family, certain incidents, addiction, poverty, illiteracy, lack of guidance affects them.

Consequently, I was there to grasp and learn all I could, therefore I did not want to talk or do anything. I did not want to interrupt their activities. I just wanted to observe. Observe their actions, reactions.

I was amazed to learn how they had perceived of me as their ‘female’ volunteer, my clothes and my gestures. I was shot at with vulgar comments momentarily. They excelled at playing and twisting my words, so as to change its meaning completely. To their surprise, I was good at dodging them. With my presence, I was determined to bridge the gap. Their constant gaze at me confirmed the urgency of the same. We shook hands, talked, and laughed.

We started with the workshop, with over 30 boys. We worked on painting and decorating matchboxes.

I was happy to see the positive reaction towards the workshop. I took as a sign of acceptance. There were moments of vexation. However, my aim was to read into their minds, rather than sit back out of disappointment. Matchbox was just a medium. Whether they painted it or not, didn’t really matter. Small dusty hands, with chewed nails, scribbling black and white stripes, and then painted it all black, when almost a beautiful unpredictable design was going to come out. Some chose to keep quiet and observe, while some found it impossible to be quiet. I was amused to overhear a myriad of comments.

It was perhaps because of lack of interaction with the other sex. Their curiosity about the other sex is incomplete. Coming from dysfunctional families, the very idea of one’s mother, sister or a friend was still hazy. Most of them come from backgrounds where a casual friendly relation with the opposite sex is stigmatized. There was a tendency in them to emulate all ”film stars” and bollywood actors.

Bruise and cuts on their wrists and arms were enough for me to understand their extent of extreme feelings.

With my presence, I hope to abridge the gap between ‘us’ and ‘them’. They are disheartened and some have lost hope of coming back on track. I don’t want to be an idealist to them, but just wish to expose them to the normalcy of life, be it towards women, elders or law. Their expression in the form of art can be our path into their minds.

– Sanya is a Masters student who has been volunteering with us for a month. This is her feedback from her first session at SPYM Sahyog de addcition home.

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Sweet Reminiscence

What does it take to not forget something? Has it ever happened to you, that when you return from somewhere you have a difficult time adjusting at home? Withdrawal symptoms (as close as it could get) a plenty and you keep asking for more of the same experience. The only thing you think about for sometime is when, where and how you will get an opportunity to go back to the same place and experience something completely new? The true meaning of the term unforgettable is learnt. When you narrate stories of your journey, your mind leaves you gasping for more. Nostalgia, happiness, a weird feeling in the stomach, everything that makes you believe that this journey was special.

I don’t exactly remember when the process started and I certainly know it hasn’t ended. Once upon a time when we only thought we would be in Glasgow one day is now a time, existing, flowing, real and lived. We weren’t tourists (only), our intent was clear. That one hour in which we get to perform our play made the trip of ten days possible. ‘Shoonya se shikhar tak’ is therefore a landmark in my life. The intense training, workshops and preparations for this production has been growing experience. As an actor and as an individual, I have unmasked a lot within me. Shoonya se shikhar tak has not only made me realise the power of my dreams, but also my abilities to work on them. I can proudly say this intensity has made me lighter and stronger at the same time. The magical part is that i dont even know when this process started. It just seems smooth now that I look back on all these memories with fondness.

All of this however wasn’t limited to the one hour in the rotunda. But I think that this growth took a different course from there. Now that I think about it, I can’t find any words to describe my feelings the first time I stepped on the cushioned stage of the rotunda. The first time I ever tested my voice inside that dome, the first time I walked, crossed from one side to the other. Each movement of my body made me want to get that emotion more and more and made me never want to end this experience. And that one hour, when all our rehearsal time, our practise came to its actual test, the hour that made it all possible was an hour that I want to keep reliving. That one hour in which I was vulnerable, both emotionally and physically, on stage and especially off it is the hour I crave. As if that’s the kind of reality I want to keep living. Shoonya se shikhar tak has reached its first shikhar. I think it is time we take it forward, continue to work with ourselves and with this experience and make this journey limitless.

Its not so much about living a dream. It doesn’t hit you always that what you thought of once upon a time, is a reality you’re living. Its after you’re back, trying to adjust with your life that you realise that you just lived what you yearned for. I want to live it again. And keep living it.

For all this and more I would like to extend my heartfelt gratitude to everyone concerned and everyone who made this possible.

“Mere sapnon ka Yeh andaaz hai, ki har rang mein shaksiyat kuch khaas hai.
Mai kehta hoon Bohot ji li zindagi, Woh kehta ki abhi aur Jine ke aas hai.”

– Rijul Kataria works as a Research Coordinator with the Foundation. This blog was written as a part of the Tin Forest International Theatre Festival in 2014

 

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Small Wonder

I have, in my own small ways, since many years, dedicated a part of my so called ‘artistic abilities’ to be manifested in any kind of re-cycling and re-using objects of daily use. There is a wonderful joy in just painting an old envelope or a paper bag to make it re-usable or using it as a canvas, that I can’t explain! One such small wonder is creating your own pen out of newspaper!

When Subhadra approached me to facilitate one such workshop at DMRC Boys home, I was overjoyed… because I knew that it was a wonderful opportunity in skill building of the boys at DMRC. I have always believed in art, and joys of creating a product that is usable (and easy to do!) as well as a means of self expression thereby fulfilling the purpose of Art Therapy!

So there I was, overjoyed to see the turnout of around 20-25 boys all eagerly anticipating to make newspaper pens, something probably unimaginable, yet ‘Do It Yourself’ sort of a thing. The session was initiated with the meditation following which all the children received their sets of refills and sheets of newspaper. The boys were quick to learn and soon understood the procedure of rolling the pen to create the appropriate shape and then decorated them as per their own wishes. Needless to say, the tehelka interns were there alongside to help manage and guide the group of boys. The boys made some wonderful vibrant pens using paints and glitter. Well, I am sure the one who writes with them is going to cherish and who knows may even get ‘inspiration’ from The Pen itself!

It was great to see the overwhelming response by the kids who wanted to make more pens even after completing theirs. This was just another attempt to have fun with ourselves and to self-absorb in some of the simplest things in life! I am hopeful that such art workshops continue taking place at tehelka as it definitely helps the children hone their skills, keeps them focused and engaged, and allows them to learn something new as well as explore their creativity…

I thank the Yuva Ekta foundation team for gifting me a lovely fun-filled evening with the kids and I hope to come back again with such art attacks!

– Bani Malhotra is pursuing Masters in Art Therapy from Washington, D.C seeking to bring together, the disciplines of art and psychology to use art therapeutically. she has a background in theatre and works with up-cycling to make diaries, newspaper pens, bags and wrapping papers etc and has been associated with the Foundation since her school days.

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